Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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