I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
