when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
