im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
