he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
