Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me