I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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