Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
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