I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
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