Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
pop tarts are not kleenex
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
