Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
