I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
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