You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
