Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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