He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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