i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
