Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
