So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
