is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
