I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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