Betty ford says i'm here all night
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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