i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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