Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize