That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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