the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
