she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize