I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
