So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
