guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize