Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
