one might say we're banned from that church
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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