do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Girls should come with a carfax report
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
