You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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