I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I think your dad took our porno
Randomize
