The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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