Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
it glows. i had to have it.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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