If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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