I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your dick twin last night
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize