what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
