We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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