went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
What a dumb baby whore.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
