I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
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