sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
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