so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize