Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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