So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
