He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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