I want to stick my p in your. b.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
