I want to walk on stilts...naked
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
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just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
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the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba