Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
sex in a hospital.. check
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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